Maybe you’ve experienced it. You’ve started dating someone and things get intense quickly. The person seems to be the partner of your dreams. You have so much in common. Over time you begin to feel depressed. You can’t pin point what is bringing on this feeling. Everything is so perfect, why do you feel anxious and sad most of the time. You start to become obsessive about the relationship. There is a push pull that keeps happening. Sometimes they speak to you like you are the most beautiful person ever, other times they ignore you. You never really feel secure in your place in this persons life. They complain often, sometimes about you. They are victims to be saved from themselves, their life.
You overlook when they stare at that imperfection on your face. The one you spend a lot of time trying to cover up with makeup. Or you notice that they will stare at other women in front of you. They call you paranoid or jealous if you bring it up. In fact you are not a jealous person but always feel insecure in this relationship. You may feel really uncomfortable with the “jokes” made at your expense (or friends or family). They intermittently put little seeds of doubt about your decision making. It can be a look, a statement, or a craftily placed body language. They deny all of it. It is you that is misunderstanding. You don’t remember it right or are being too sensitive.
When you get upset and cry they say you are overreacting, maybe acting crazy. They didn’t mean it, you always take everything the wrong way. When you look at them while your crying, you may see a small micro expression, a smirk that flashes across their face. They are enjoying your pain. Welcome to the world of a narcissistic relationship. You are being emotionally abused.
There is help and recovery from emotional and physical abuse. Therapy is a great way to begin the healing process.